Casimir's diary

[~Caroline~]

Dear thingy,
Right, i cannot be bothered to give you a name so I'll simply call you "thingy". Fortunatly you cannot talk so you cannot protest about this pathetic and slightly irrational name. I'm not very good with there type of things, as i keep forgetting that i even have one and surely i will forget about this one. Typical. But yes, this is (hopefully) where i will write my thoughts, emotions (gay!joking...) and all that crap human stuff. Why am i not inhumane? Damn God. Is that possible? i have no idea. I'm ranting to myaelf again...
Right my point; this will be SECRET! Pff...yeah. There will be people reading this every day as, knwoing me, i'll leave it lying on the bed freely. Irony.
Anyway, the fact that i'm blind with not improve my hand writing. So i wish you good luck to all you readers!! Today was an ordinary day. Boring, sick teenage jokes about *coughs* and all that stuff. Classes were boring and hard to follow, seeing i can't see the teacher in front of me and they always pick me. Why me? I'm blind, disabled like lad with no help. Sounds really pathetic no?
"Casimir why don't you tell me what the square root of 1034 is?" says some random teacher.
"Piss off, looser," i muttur and get away with it.
Woot me!! Gramatically incorrect.
Umm...what else.
Oh yes my girlfriend!! Forgot about her...sorry Scar...
Well, she's pretty (i think...well according to Jase) ands he's nice. But, of course, she likes Dorian. Damn Dorian. Damn the look-a-like-of-Elvis-Presley. The way she talk to him. Bah! But i like her, perhaps love her (soppy! but the truth!Ha!) and she's nice and faithful. God, if you cheat on me, i'm dead. Hopefully that won't happen...hopefully
Then there is liza. Ta dah! *dramatical music in background*
Liza. Childhood lover. good friend. Friend of my "best-friend". Known her since the beginning of time. Lover? Don't know. She's jelous though...really jelous. But is it of me or the happiness? Um, knowing liza, the Happiness. Curious isn't it?
Oh and ciggarettes! My best friend! How druggy of me to write/think. Oh, yay!! I named my packet "Fred" you know? i'm weird...
Anyway,
Bye bye who dares to read this "VERY SECRET DIARY OF CASIMIR WHO WILL KILL YOU IF HE FINDS OUT!". So yes, i warn you read the title which doesn't exist. haha!
Casimir

[~Caroline~]

This time you're hardly worth a name. You're only a little black book after all, not something with a heart or emotions. You're just paper and dye and my ink is filling you with the little thoughts you have. Even though you are only a little black book, you still contain every thought i have, my deepest secrets and my troubles which have forever fogged up my troubled mind. You are both nothing but everything. An oxymoron is seems.
My life has taken an interesting twist, one curious yet dreadful. My heart is drugged,my mind capricious; my life a cliche. Type 'Poor Little Rich Boy' if you want it. I'm being quite melodramatic though, but what would a teenager without its melodrama? I'm a paradox, the centre of the uttermost caprice which whells through my mind and soul, blinding me physically and spiritually. I can definatly find no confort in religion so that is not an option. No, i don't know what will help me. Scarlette is doing all she can. Poor thing. I'm just soaking up her kindness, like a sponge of some sort of something along those lines. I'm using her, like one of the many drugs i'm using. Meth, Cocaine, pot....you know the whole poisonous lot. They make me see colours and that's what i want. Liza is just a subcategroy in my mind though, being pushed away. She doesn't want me, only for a friend/family member. That's good for me. Lynne though, with her love decleration doesn't help. And her kiss. Well that awoken these forbidden memories. that hardly helped. that night i didn't sleep but just drugged myself, numbing my minding. Trying to forget or comprehend. that never came to me. Lynne now is my paradox, Scarlette my sponge, Liza my walking stick. My world is both empty yet full, my mind both fogged yet clogged. And here i go playing with those effing oxymorons.

I'm not bloody Shakespeare.